NaPoWriMo 2020 – Day ??

POEM: “Missing You”

I miss you. Your laugh, so clear and hearty—it still echoes in my ears. Your scent a whisper in my memory—if I inhale deep enough I can still taste the mild sweetness of the essence. Warm earth combined with an intoxicating masculine aroma that I am drawn to. I hug my pillow close, taking in the residual wafts.

I miss your voice. How can I describe a melody I know by how my heart smiles when I hear it? Gentle rasp, warm chocolate, thick honey, and certainty. Words tumble and flip out your mouth so rapidly it’s hard to keep up. Or maybe it’s because I hang onto every syllable. Replaying how you create sounds and harmonies so beautiful.

These remnants of you caress me inside and out, memories fluttering behind my eyelids. I allow myself this, this moment of vulnerability and acceptance. I miss you. Fully and wholly. The familiar ache of loss hovers just beyond the edge of remembrance. I embrace the ache, waiting knowingly for the inevitable jolt back to reality.

NaPoWriMo 2020 – Day 4

“Monday”

Your scent wafts into my nose as if you’d just left the bed,

Covering me with the warmth of familiarity.

Your pillow clutched in my arms, damp from tears I shed,

Can’t cope with your absence, not even subconsciously.

Earth and spice, and something inherently you,

Inhale deep—so alluring and unique, it calls to me.

If I hold my breath, close my eyes, deja vu,

I’m carried into, hazy remnants, visions of you next to me.

Hibernating beneath blankets and sheets, I’m sheltered.

In here the smell of you alters my reality.

Strong arms protect, legs entwined, kisses ground , I’m centered.

In here, you are still mine and yesterday becomes eternity.

NaPoWriMo 2020 & Self-Care

This post serves multiples purposes. It of course is going to feature a poem for NaPoWriMo, but that poem will be based off of Day 11 of 30 Days of Self-Care from Blessing Manifesting. So I’m a bit all over the place lol, but thanks to the Day 12 prompt on the NaPoWriMo site the poem is in the format of a Triolet (just learned this word/form today!)—an 8 line poem with a tight rhyme scheme in which specific lines are repeated: ABaAabAB, where capital letters indicate repeated lines. I happened to be flipping through the day prompts and decided Day 11’s prompt was a good way to do some verbal/written self-care.

The prompt is as follows: How would you describe yourself, in a loving way, to a stranger?

Dope right?! I need to learn to speak and think lovingly about myself more frequently. I am truly so mean and hard on myself—it’s cruel really. But I am breaking that bad habit, and stopping negative thoughts as they come. Sometimes it’s not as easy to flip the negative into a positive, but I always come back to love and replace those negative thoughts with the truth that I know of. It’s always so easy for me to slip into a dark and hateful space mentally, but like I said, we are working on making those trips short and infrequent. I’m learning to be mindful of my blessings even when I feel sad, inadequate, frustrated, and insecure.

This poem represents how I see myself and how I aim to express myself to and through the world. I hardly ever say such adoring things about myself, but I think this is my favorite poem of NaPoWriMo 2020 thus far (even though I’m 7 poems behind lol).

Remember to be kind and loving to yourself. Treat and compliment yourself how you treat and compliment your best friends, be your biggest cheerleader and support system. Here’s my first ever Triolet poem…

“She is Light”

Iridescent—She is Light spawned from Love.

Her laughter, genuine, amber gold.

Passionate wanderer, creative nurturer, she blooms above

Iridescence. She is Light. Spawned from Love.

Faceted gem, her essence wafts enchanting melodies of

Peace and possibility, strength and versatility. Embodiment of soul.

Iridescent She. Light-spawn of Love.

Her. Laughter. Genuine amber. Gold.

NaPoWriMo 2020 – Day 2

“Salve”

Be not afraid, it’ll get better. You know comfort in your own embrace.

Slow your erratic beating, it will get better. We know this ache, familiar it is. The seared edges of the emptiness, contracting so.

Shhh my darling, no time for tears. It won’t last always. You know what’s on the horizon, no matter the bleak of yesterday. Find your mustard seed my dear, grasp it tightly. Stand firm on your truth and know it.

We Will Love Again.

POEM: Inner Thoughts

NaPoWriMo 2016
Day 4; Poem 2

Oh how I really
Wish I could tell you
Fuck it, fuck it all
And have a good day.

POEM: I Know A Man

NaPoWriMo 2016
Day 4; Poem 1

I know a Man.
From ear to ear his name graces my lips as a smile.
Ambition unmatched, he is determined to earn that which is already in his posession.
My heart,
Now his.
His perception is uncanny
Always in my head, speaking my thoughts aloud
As though they were his own.
I know a Man
Who courts my insecurities,
Wooing them past gates of confinement,
Guiding them to Queenly confidence.
I know a Man
Whose words elicit a dozen emotions at once.
Thrusting me into the depths of excitement and anxiety while providing the greatest comfort I’ve ever known.
I know a Man,
Who knows my secrets and my flaws
Yet he loves me all the more.
His desire is to know my soul,
Protect my heart,
And align them with his.
I know a Man
Who wants to know all of Me.
My wants and needs
My passions and pain
So that he can give me everything I’ve lost and not yet found,
And show me who I am through his eyes.

It’s Been a WHILE…

Lord knows I have been SLACKING super majorly on writing on this blog!

But never fear, I have not forgotten it. I am actually going to be starting a new experiment/project, and this will be the laboratory in which work.

I have decided that I want to become a creative writing teacher…it scares the HELL out of me but, I guess that means that I should be doing it since it takes me out of my comfort zone. It’s sorta been a secret dream of mine to teach writing, and now I’m gonna try and make it happen!

But anyway, onto this experiment of mine….seeing as I have NOT participated in NaPoWriMo this year (i know, it sucks…been too busy and I actually forgot for the first week or so) I figured I could but my writing skills to use in another way, one that would possibly prepare me for my future career.

1.  I have re-joined the RPG-Fiction site We’ve Got Obsessions as a means of character development and to reawaken my creative brain.

and…

2. I will be doing writing prompts on here…

I won’t be posting EVERYTHING I write on WGO on here, but I will post the best scenarios that I write. As far as the writing prompts, I haven’t found a direct source for them as of yet, but I will be searching, and once I find it, I will begin writing! Now realistically speaking, I probably won’t do one a day. It would be nice, but I know my life and how distracted and how busy I can get (like right now I’m supposed to be retyping these Arts and Crafts lesson plans smh). So I figure anywhere between 2-5 writing prompts per week is a good starting point.

My goal is to get back in the habit of writing everyday and to make it so that I can be comfortable again creating my own worlds, cause quite frankly I’m uber rusty! And how can I teach someone something that I don’t even practice myself?!?!

Anyways, like I said, I should be doing work right now. Now that I have gotten this off my chest I can resume doing the work that I am being paid to do.

Ciao!

POEM: Could This Be?

Could this be an overreaction?
This need I have to be near you
To inhale your words
And breathe in your scent
Maybe an obsession?
Cause I count the minutes
Days and seconds that go by
Until we speak again
Til I am engulfed in your embrace
Or is this an addiction?
I feel as though I’m drifting, in and out
Comatose, intoxicated
You cloud my sight and flood my ears
Consume my thoughts
Leave me anxious and wanting
Could this be love?

Casanova.

He is the forbidden fruit I spoke of in a poem I posted earlier. Casanova. Of course that is not his real name, but he embodies the essence of the man after whom I have chosen his alias. Everything about him pulls me in. And like a Icarus to the sun, I fly, on my wings of feathers and wax.

Sigh…I am not sure why he is my most recent male attraction, but there he is. Yes he’s handsome, he’s talented and funny, yes, all of those things. But so are other guys, but there is just something about Casanova that I just can’t shake…My attraction to him reminds me of a theme inin the myth of Icarus–greed. I, like Icarus, am so wrapped up in having what I want that I pay no heed to the dangers that lie ahead…and with Casanova, he is the worst kind of danger for a girl like me. I want too much to be with him, and not so much in a relationship with him, but rather writhing beneath him. Lust is something I haven’t much really had to deal with, but with this man, I fear that I have opened Pandora’s box and liked what I found. And so, because of this, I wrote another poem that was inspired by Casanova…I just hope I can let this attraction go sooner rather than later. Nothing good can come of it.

“Feathers and Wax”

He’s at the back of my mind
Like an itch I can’t scratch
A habit I can’t shake
The monkey on my back
Constant ache between my thighs.
My body remembers the feel of him
His voice drums in my thoughts
Face highlights my dreams.
This craving, triggered by just his name
Has me soaring head first,
Inhibitions to the wind, into the sun,
On wings of feathers and wax.

POEM: When it Rains

“When it Rains”

It comes and goes,
Much without warning.
The soft pitter-patter
Growing into a resounding symphony.
Its forceful presence
Emits a calm reverie
Bringing down upon the earth
Its cleansing and purifying waves.
Drip drop, plop,
again and again.
Washing away the worries of today
And the sins of yesterday.
Sporadically and righteously
Feeding the seeds of promised harvest,
Rinsing clean what once was of filth.
Leaving behind a pristine slate
And the hope of abundant tomorrows.