Things in life cannot always go as planned. More often than not there are forces set in motion that are beyond our control but they loop, and travel, and wind up having a huge impact on our lives.
This is kind of what happened with Buck (not his real name of course). Buck and I met, unbeknownst to me, a long time ago at a party. Somehow, since that time, he and I wound up following and befriending each other on social networks. We have kept up with one another for a while and got a chance to meet again and hang out when I went down for a visit in Louisiana a few weeks ago. He is a sweetheart and really funny.
Long story short, I’m attracted to him. I like him. Now for the few who actually keep up with me, Superman is still in my life–but he and I are not an item, that was his choice. I am perfectly happy with still being single though. I think it’s best especially since I will be going back to LA soon. I know it will be hard on Superman, and I don’t want him fighting temptation and being stressed out because I am so far away. So he is free to do as he pleases, and so am I. But I do still have feelings for him–there are just some complications in the emotional department that have damped my once gung-ho feelings for him and for what I wished was an us.
But not I was not looking for anyone to fill any void left by any of my exes or by Superman. Honestly I was kind of in a fuck-it-all state of mind. I vowed to just focus on myself, my health, and my goals–which I have been doing ^_^. I was all good until Buck came into the picture…smh. What can I say, he just popped up one day and we clicked.
I have decided to nickname him Buck because that’s what he reminds me of. He’s southern, a gentleman, and the epitome of a country boy–he hunts and everything! So that’s what I will call him. I won’t go too deep into describing him, but just know that he caught my eye for reasons I can’t really explain. He’s sweet, funny, (though I said those already) different, laid back, smart, good with his hands, ambitious, talented, caring…yeah. All that good stuff. And he’s honest. He’s real with me about who he is and what he wants. I don’t know if any of you men out there realize that honesty, with yourself and with us, is really all it takes to get and hook a woman. We just want to know your intentions, and what you want. We need that. Why? It’s so we know that we aren’t the only one with feelings and so that we know how to act, react, and feel when you’re around. He did all of that for me. And I appreciate that more than anything else he could have or already has done for me. I have had my share of pathological liars, avoid the subject liars, beat around the bush liars, blatant liars, pretend to forget liars, bullshit liars, etc. I have come across all of them–and I will not stand for it any more. I don’t have the time.
Now don’t get me wrong–I don’t want a guy to jump into a relationship or take a trip down the isle with me after a month, nah. But I want someone who is honest about what they do or don’t feel, that way I don’t waste my time. I hate wasting my time on someone who had a hidden agenda or secret intentions. I’m rambling again….
Anyway! Buck, yeah, Lana likes him. But I am still in my selfish mode, I am just in my selfish mode with someone outside my door waiting on me to be done haha! This is what I like about being single though, the dating and the getting to know people–I shall keep you guys posted on the adventures of Country Boy Buck and Lana.
Ciao ❤
2 Weeks Notice 